Dear Lunchboxes,
Whatever happened to you? I may not have known you well, but I am nevertheless concerned about your absence. Over time, you just slowly faded away from memory (and cafeterias). These days, people who pack their lunch keep them in more streamlined packages with pockets and cooling installation. I’m sorry, but It's true. You’ve been replaced.
I’m acting surprised, but I'm more disappointed: you should have stuck around and, at least, tried to stay in the market. So what if you were unsanitary and caused sandwiches to get warm? So what if you could be fashioned into a weapon? I saw you at a garage sale for $5; is that what you think you're worth? You had a Spider-man logo, AND YOU'RE WORTH 5 DOLLARS?!?
Maybe you could try a new career, like that time you tried to be a pencil holder. Weren't you an actor? I swear I remember seeing you in those 90s kid movies. I know you can do great things: what if you tried being a COLORED pencil holder, or a PEN holder? Please, think of the possibilities. I hope you get out of this rut you’re in and do greater things.
Sincerely, Kevin.
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